The more I push to try and get in here the more I seem to find ways to avoid it. I am not even sure as to why, mental block or just laziness. More laziness than anything, I have been wondering as to what is the point of doing this……why should I blog/post anymore?
This has always been a place to just let loose but the more I look at what I have done I am overly critical and over analytical of my own stuff. I love the written word, it is probably one of the most powerful tools out there. I also love the physically written word, in the form of calligraphy. I started playing with calligraphy, I am not to shabby but by no means will I be doing anything professional anytime soon. Is it just a fun hobby. It is one of those things you really have to practice to be good at, I have watched many YouTube videos and learned that I actually suck at calligraphy ha! But by no means has that deterred me from doing it ha! I keep a sketch book and a journal for all my scratching and attempts, it is actually very therapeutic. Kind of like those adult coloring books, and yes I have those too!
So, why should I continue this? I have almost deleted this page on numerous occasions, but as anyone can see I have not. It is an enteral struggle, why to keep doing something that seems to have no point or reason. This page has no real purpose or direction. May of the people I follow on the various internet platforms all have a purpose or general idea….but I seem to be lacking that.
I look at all the things I like: News, Fitness, Video Games, Comedy and general debauchery. And then I think, ‘How can I incorporate that into this page in a more coherent flow?’ The answer…..there is no answer. Why should I pigeon hold myself to any one idea or purpose?
Right now I am trying to just come in here once a week and post something….anything and as of late I am failing. I have no direction for what I do here, and I am ok with that. What bothers me is that I am so inconsistent with my post. I have no desire to turn this into fitness page, a news page or a ranting and raving page. For now it is just going to be a place I come to, just to be me…..I need to stop over analyzing why and just post. So forgive the poor grammar and punctuation, I will try to keep the spelling errors to a minimum but no real promises HA!
